Question #1: What is my deep, authentic intention?


Every action we take is powered by our underlying intentions. Sometimes we are very conscious of our intentions, but most often what truly motivates us to do (or: not do) something slumbers somewhere deep in the folds of our subconscious.

As black women we sometimes suffer a debilitating disconnect from what we truly desire and strive for in our lives in favor of conflicting expectations and limiting stereotypes that are heaped upon us externally. Just as our immediate circumstances may seem to have stacked the proverbially cards of life against some of us, so – too – does the “box” we’ve been placed inside. Whether that box has been constructed by our community, mainstream society or the media, it often puts who we are supposed to be at odds with who we are.

The Result: Many of us find ourselves rotating on life’s hamster wheel, feeling more and more disoriented and dissatisfied because we’re chasing after what others have told us to seek instead listening to – and trusting! – that small inner voice that speaks for our True Self.

When you are assessing your life and developing the necessary strategies and plans to improve it, it’s essential to get back in touch with your own deep and authentic intentions.

What’s your “why”?

While you are thinking about the areas of your life in which you’d like to see movement/progress/change in the coming year, reflect on the following questions:

  • Is your life in need of a major transformation or are you simply eager to take it to the next level?
  • Was the vision of life you are moving towards born out of your own innate values and vision?  Or are you hoping to live up to what those around you (family, spouse/partner, friends) feel is “right”?
  • How will it impact your life – and your belief in yourself – if you don’t change anything?

To get a better feel for where your energy and time went in 2010 – and to decide where you will need to invest those valuable resources in 2011 – download the  “Wheel of Life” worksheets and chart your resource allotment for 2011.

Tomorrow: Question #2 – Do I feel joy in moving forward?

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2 Comments

Filed under Coaching

2 responses to “Question #1: What is my deep, authentic intention?

  1. kekemichel

    Happy New Year Trina!

    I just read your January 2011 post and it is informative and practical. I really like when you talk about the Black woman and her need to embrace her authentic self versus the pseudo self. We tend to be what others want us to be or what is “socially acceptable.” Many women are trying to fight to overcome such a rut. Thank you for sharing.

    I have just started a new blog today to help Black women live their best lives! It would be an honor for you to subscribe and leave commentary and inspiration on my blog. Meanwhile, I am definitely subscribing to your blog and will leave commentary too.
    ~Wealth and success

  2. Trina

    Happy New Year, Keke!

    Is it just me or has the public focus in the US on black women’s lives and (perceived) shortcomings intensified exponentially in recent years? If I didn’t know so many vibrant, successful, well-adjusted and intelligent black women myself, I would think that we were going the way of the kiwi: fast heading for – merciful! – extinction.

    Although this shift in public perception doesn’t directly impact my main target group (although those of us who are expats are still very aware of what’s going on), unless checked very soon, it will only be a matter of time before it does.

    We have to be command of our own stories and take over the reigns of the public dialogue concerning us. In order to do that successfully, we have to be grounded and purpose-drive; reflective and proactive.

    I love the idea of your blog! Happiness is indeed an extremely significant issue. We are continually bombarded by messages geared to keep us unhappy and dissatisfied. According to the media, we’re never thin/light/rich/smart/etc., enough.

    In reality we often have very fulfilling/fulfilled lives, complete with all the ups and downs that go along with the normal human condition. Of course, there is always room for improvement, but another brand name handbag, a larger automobile or a bigger house will never be the source authentic personal growth.

    Thank you for inviting me to participate in your blog – and I certainly look forward to leaving my comments there and look forward to your future feedback here!

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