TODAY: I make a pact to support and encourage myself – for the long haul.
I realize that no one will give me the life that I want. Only I can do that. And I will!
~
In my intro text for this site I mention how few and far between the role models are for women of African descent living and working in Europe. That’s why an article written by Tara Sophia Mohr on HuffPo – “10 Rules For Brilliant Women” – really struck a chord with me. And I asked myself: “How do these 10 rules translate to gain relevancy in the lives of women of African descent?” In the coming 10 weeks I’ll be sharing my own spin on those 10 rules with all of you.
During the TableTalks my panelists and I talked about “critical mass”. The fact that – compared to the US – there still aren’t enough people of African descent in European countries to easily ensure the kind of presence and representation we need to actively counteract stereotypes and general lack of knowledge about us. (Mind you, I said it can’t be done as easily, not that it couldn’t be done at all!)
Here’s why having role models that look like us is so important:
- …they give us the courage to dream and aspire to something bigger and better than “common wisdom” has taught us to expect for ourselves! Not “up in the sky, by and by”, but here and now!
- …they show us that it can be done! Whether it’s publishing a book, getting a promotion or simply having a fulfilling relationship with partners and our communities.
- …they help others to have as much faith in our dreams and aspirations as we do ourselves! Seeing is believing – so the more (often) people see us successfully navigating the straits of our lives, the sooner barriers of ignorance and malevolence will crumble.
But there is nothing a role model can do for you, if you are not willing to do for yourself – first!
So, starting today, make that conscious step to say “yes” to yourself.
- Yes to your values and goals and strengths.
- Yes to your history and accomplishments and dreams.
- And – most importantly – yes to the journey you’ve chosen for yourself!
Uncaged Birds™ 
Thanking and giving praises for the inspiring affirmation for today. Sharing something fabulous I came across while doing some research.
“…I have touched the four corners of the horizon, for from hard searching it seems to me that tears and laughter; love and hate, make up the sum of life.” Zora Neal Hurston (African-American writer, folklorist and lover of life itself) Best known for her inspirational book, especially for women, “Their Eyes Were Watching God”.
So I, Gye, say to you Hello from the distant island of Nevis and encourage all to live it up, laugh it up and fe’ sure get up now and then to do your dance! In essence no matter current circumstances — celebrate life1
Thanks for adding Zora Neal Hurston to the mix, Gye! Another “shero” of mine. Greetings back to you in Nevis and – yes – let’s not forget to dance… 🙂
I say yes to others rather than myself. How often do I say yes to me, rarily. wow that last entry on this post made me ponder. Why simple principles to live and follow by yet too difficult to resonate with me. I am trying though and learning more of who I am.
“So, starting today, make that conscious step to say “yes” to yourself.
■Yes to your values and goals and strengths.
■Yes to your history and accomplishments and dreams.
■And – most importantly – yes to the journey you’ve chosen for yourself”
I think we all find this one difficult at one time or another, Renelda. As women we are socialized to put others first. As women of African descent we are also (subtly) socialized to believe that all other groups are more important than we are. Even when many of us broadcast “The Battle Hymn of the Strong Black Woman”, if we really look at our actions (and read our thoughts) we see that we are far from it.
The first step: To be conscious of how we ‘really” feel. To expand our field of vision to enable ourselves to look beyond all the braggadocio and (re-)discover the lost and lonely little girl we often still are – yearning for support and affection and acknowledgment.
Once we’ve acknowledged that little girl, we can begin our open dialogue with her… Learn to listen to what her heart is trying to tell us.
When we begin to listen to her… to really hear her… that’s our first conscious step of our journey towards saying “yes” to ourselves.